Building Resiliency - an introduction ...

Resiliency is defined as the ability to bounce back from injury, failure, or misfortune. Much of the research in this area states that the traits that are necessary to be resilient are learned from experiences and can be taught through conversations and reflections. In the book “The Resilience Revolution (Brendtro and Larson, 2006) the authors state that in order to be resilient we need to build trust, find the unique talents and abilities of each individual, empower individuals to take responsibility for their actions and decisions, and assist each person to find their sense of purpose in the world.
The basis of all our learning comes from failure and pain. The greater the pain (without killing us) will cause the greatest initiative for learning and growth. Pain is a powerful motivator that drives all our emotions, thoughts and behaviors. But when kids or adults are in pain, how we deal with them and the steps we take to assist them in overcoming their obstacles are different than those that are successful and thriving. Most times when dealing with people that are hurting we act on our own anger, fear, or frustrations rather than being empathetic and really trying to understand the other person. Threats cause conflict and withdrawal. Blame and criticism obscure strengths and exaggerate flaws, and sarcasm and accusations make the hurt even deeper and destroys trust. We need to look beneath the problems in search of the cause and for possible solutions. We need to fill the deficits in their lives with trust, talents, power and purpose.Over the next 5 days I will explore the areas of trust, talents, power and purpose and how they can be effectively used to enhance everyone’s sense of resilience and success.